The Four Scariest Picture Books

This is by no means an exhaustive list, but these are freaking scary.

#4 “My Animals” by Xavier Denaux

Looks nice, doesn’t it? The entire book is pictures of animals, done mainly in black and white (with a feature colour here or there) and clever little holes through the pages where the eye of one animal is also the bellybutton of another. That kind of thing. It’s Louisette’s favourite book.

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One tiny problem. . . things get pretty macabre pretty quickly.

ImageThat’s right: the eye of the sheep is COMING TO GET YOU.

#3 “Teddy the Policeman”

Great! A simplified way to tell kids about trusting policemen to look after them. How nice. Or not.

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This policeman is prepared. But what kind of miscreant needs the automatic application of handcuffs?

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That’s right kids (especially YOU, Timmy: I see that tell-tale dirt on your face). The policeman is much, much bigger than you and he’s going to take you away.

#2: God Made Me

Now THIS is obviously going to be a book about how God made you special and unique. . .

Image. . . and how he can steal your face at any time. Just because.

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#1: God Made Colours

Staying on the all-powerful deity theme, another brightly-coloured offering from the Christian Bookshop.

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As you can tell, Louisette loves it (either than or she is trying desperately to MAKE IT STOP). The book goes through a number of colours, then ends by bringing it all together in one picture:

ImageJust one teeny tiny question: WHY IS THE SKY BLEEDING???

It’s obviously not because the picture had too much blue – there’s barely any blue at all. It’s because God is on his way to smote all the naughty little girls and boys.

Sleep tight.

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